How to Make Banana Bread

This is a plain and simple step by step guide to simple banana bread.

Step 1- Find bananas with mold growing on the stems. Open them and determine the fruit is still good. Announce you are going to make banana bread.

Step 2 – Find the following recipe: 

1 1/4 cups sugar
1/2 cup butter or margarine, softened
2 eggs
1 1/2 cups mashed very ripe bananas (3 to 4 medium)
1/2 cup buttermilk
1 teaspoon vanilla
2 1/2 cups all-purpose flour
1 teaspoon baking soda
1 teaspoon salt
1 cup chopped nuts, if desired 

Step 3 – Eliminate nuts. Nuts do not belong in baked good. Ever.

Step 4 – Discover your banana’s do not meet the measurement requirement; reduce flour by 1/4 cup.

5 – Remember to turn on oven.

Step 6 – Discover you do not have enough flour; dig in the back of the  cabinet. Discover a zip lock bag of 1-ish year old opened gluten free rice flour.  Top of flour. Call it good.

Step 7 – Allow small child to stir dry ingredients together. Be lulled into a false sense of security.

Step 8 – Use butter instead of margarine. Margarine is gross.

Step 9 – Cave in when small child asked to crack an egg. Thoroughly demonstrate how to crack an egg. Watch as small child ignores you and leaves you with shell in the bowl and egg on the counter.

Step 10 – Salvage what you can of egg. Send child upstairs to put on egg free shirt.

Step 11 – Decide using the left over coconut milk is a good idea in place of regular milk. 
Step 12 – Google coconut milk as a substitute in baking.

Step 13 – Mix all ingredients into a bowl and stir like crazy so you finish before small child comes downstairs and demands a turn.

Step 14 – Decide you want muffins. Pull out muffin tins and cave to demands that the left over Star Wars cupcake liners be used.

Step 15 – Fill one cup cake liner then change your mind one more time. Attempt to empty liner back into bowl. Fail and make a mess. Replace liner.

Step 16 – Pull out frozen berries. Allow child to add berries to mix.

Step 17 – Turn your back for 1.89 seconds. Return and find the child has filled the liners with berries.

Step 18 – Empty liners into mix. Replace liners.

Step 19 – Send child outside.

Step 20 – Mix ingredients to incorporate berries.

Step 21 – Spoon into liners.

Step 22 – Discover you have too much batter, pull out giant muffin tin and grab discarded butter wrapper next to you on the counter to grease it.

Step 23 – One of your sticky discarded liners was tossed on top of the butter wrapper. You have now swabbed your tin with batter.

Step 24 – Dump extra batter into tins anyway. 

Step 25 – Place in 350 degree preheated oven for 20 minutes.

Here is your final recipe:

1-ish cup mashed bananas

1 1/2 cup regular all purpose flour

3/4 cup gluten free rice flour

1 teaspoon salt

1 teaspoon baking soda

1/2 cup butter

1 1/4 cup sugar

1 1/2 eggs

1 teaspoon vanilla

1/2 cup coconut milk (the thinner stuff from the bottom half of a can, not the thick creamy stuff from the top half of a can.)

1 1/4-ish cups frozen berries of your choice.

photo (43)

Step 26 – Leave all dishes in the sink for someone else to clean.


About bjpramann

I'm a work at home Mom/Writer/Artist and work in office PA for LifeLight Global. Pretty much anything goes here. .
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1 Response to How to Make Banana Bread

  1. Amanda says:

    Banana bread is just so wonderfully yummy! I swear I could eat it every day!

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